Our first Restaurant Review.....almost!

Since the inauguration of NN we have covered a wide range of subjects from politics to manimal welfare to the arts to sport and much more, but as yet we haven't had a restaurant review and being the resident food critic I think this is way overdue and I am here to right this outrageous wrong.

However, that said, there does remain one small obstacle to my righting this terrible oversight.  I think my colleagues, and the Boss in particular, were extracting the urine when they appointed me restaurant critic for NN.  I mean, as much as I would love to visit a restaurant and comment on the grub, I'm a feline manimal and try as I might I can't get in!  For some strange reason when I start speaking to them their first reaction is to get a bit freaked out!  If I didn't know better I'd say they'd never seen a talking manimal before, let alone one who can speak Spanish as well as English!  But since I know that's not such an oddity (all us manimals here speak several languages.....take Negrito for example, he's trilingual; English, Spanish and the universal language of 'lurve') this cannot be the problem.  Anyway, I chewed the problem over whilst I sat and devoured my 3 o'clock snack - a platter of cold meats, 1/2 kg blue cheese, 1/2 kg non-blue cheese, 2 whole trout, 1L milk, a bag of Haribo Teddy Bears and a bar of Dairy Crunch; not much really, but it was only a snack! - and then it came to me!

You see, the problem wasn't so much that I couldn't get in to the restaurants, as they all closed the doors when I got near!  "Why?", I hear you cry.  "Why won't you let Sonny Tiger in?"  

I'll tell you why, shall I.  That ha-ha, ever-so-funny, hilarious Boss and my so-called friends had set me up!  As each restaurant closed it's doors I was able to glance behind me and spy the NN team chuckling behind their disguises.  Yes, their disguises!!!  Did they really think I wouldn't spot Rudi dressed as Audrey Hepburn - I mean, as far as I know, Ms. Hepburn didn't have whiskers!! - and Mister Cool dressed as David Ginola! Putting on a wig and holding a bottle of shampoo mate, ain't much of a disguise!  And the Boss dressed up as Mariano Rajoy!  Since when would the Spanish Head of State visit our part of the world?!!!  

That was when I smelled a rat!  Luckily, because I'd already eaten the rat escaped digestion, but even so I was onto them!  So when we got back to the newsroom I confronted the team and they spilled the beans - which I did eat, cos I can't resist beans!  They make thy fart!  And I loves to fart!  

It seems I was given the job solely because I like my food.....just a little bit mind...... and I might be just a teensy, weensy bit overweight (though by who's standards I'd like to know!  As far I'm concerned I'm just 'well-covered')  and this because I always 'clean my plate,' ....well, and anyone else's plate within paw reach - I hate waste after all - but they went and told one local restauranteur, who became scared I'd eat him out of house and custom and so once he saw me approaching he promptly battened down the hatches, then WhatsApp'd his mates who all did the same!  Hence.....no restaurant review!

Where's all me trimmings?

Is that the starter?

So instead I give you two pictures....one of my hero, Adam Richman, who can eat almost as much as me, and another of a roast chicken, cos that's what I'm eating right now to console myself!

 I'll be back soon with more tasty tit-bits to make your mouth water.

Sonny Tiger for NN, hungry and in Spain!

  

Culture at NN? You'd better believe it!

All of us at NN love BBC nature documentaries and last night's Winterwatch (BBC2) was no exception. The night time shots of the grey seal (Halichoerus grypus) population at Blakeney Point were amazing. We were transfixed, even little Sonny Tiger who could only speculate what the seals might taste like!! That boy!! His mind is always on food!

Chris Packham's commentary was hugely informative, as usual, especially when he pointed out the 'body slapping' the bulls indulge in, was a 'cultural' oddity restricted to the seal populations found on the East coast of the UK. But that one little word; culture, encompasses so much biologically and anthropologically speaking, that I was pushed to investigate the term further.

Interestingly, until very recently culture was deemed to be a specifically hu-man trait. Such is the hubris of mankind, but I digress.

According to Chambers, culture is defined (rather loosely) as 'the result of cultivation; refinement in manners, thought, taste, etc,' with the adjective cultured meaning 'well educated, esp in the arts,' indicating rather strongly, I would suggest, that only hu-mans can be cultured! 

However, in recent decades this rather narrow definition has undergone some 'refinement,' especially with regard to animal behaviour where it is now widely assumed that many animals (e.g. many primate species; chimpanzees [Pan trogoldytes], Japanese macaques [Macaca fuscata]; in birds; cowbirds [Molothrus ater], starlings [Sturnus vulgaris] ) possess culture, including apparently, the grey seals at Blakeney.

Hiya!!

But empirically, how does one go about proving that a particular animal species, or indeed a particular population of a species, possesses culture?  

Table 1, below, lists one train of thought where there are 8 conditions, each of which needs to be satisfied empirically (through experimentation) in order to demonstrate that a species has culture. The table is fairly self-explanatory, and since this isn't a scientific paper I shan't be running through a long-winded explanation of each condition individually, suffice to say that in order to satisfy each condition in turn may take many years of pain-staking research which can often end up being summarised in a single word, often missed, in a BBC documentary. That Chris Packham can describe the 'body slapping' of the bull seals as 'culture' would indicate to me that some scientist, somewhere has gone through the painful, time-consuming process of doing just that. As a Canine layman I would suggest that perhaps the hardest one to prove these days might be 'diffusion' since in the wild habitat fragmentation might limit the interaction between different groups, or populations, of the same species.

Looks like the Boss!

For example, a commonly accepted form of chimpanzee culture these days, and one that many TV naturalists would be familiar with, is termite fishing with sticks. Historically, chimpanzees ranged from the West coast of Africa to the East, but now due to hu-man intervention their range is much more localised and disparate, such that at Gombe, Tanzania in East Africa termite fishing can be observed, whilst in West African populations (such as that in the Tai forest, Ivory Coast) it is absent. Does that mean that this behaviour is not then a cultural innovation? I think not. I'm really just playing Devil's advocate to illustrate the potential difficulties a researcher might encounter in his/her quest to prove their hypotheses.

Table 1. Conditions of criteria for recognising cultural acts in non-hu-man species (from Kroeber, 1928; McGrew & Tutin, 1978)
Innovation	New pattern is invented or modified
Dissemination	Pattern acquired by another from innovator
Standardisation	Form of pattern is consistent & stylised
Durability	Pattern performed outwith presence of demonstrator
Diffusion	Pattern spreads from one group to another
Tradition	Pattern persists from innovators generation to the next
Non-subsistence	Pattern transcends subsistence
Naturalness	Pattern shown in absence of direct hu-man influence

All this begs the question, why on earth are going on about this on your blog?

Well, I'll tell you, shall I? That one word, culture, set me to thinking whether we at NN possess culture. We have no empirical data to prove this one way or the other. But I would suggest that we have anecdotal evidence that would indicate that us Manimals at NN are indeed cultured.  

This is Nacho. She is Mum to all but one of the Feline manimals here at NN. Sadly, Nacho is no longer with us but her legacy remains and Mini, Dijon and Rudi are all her progeny. Sonny came from, we're not sure where, but he just walked in our door looking for a job when he was no more than 6 or 7 weeks old!! Anyway, the point is that Nacho began a trend which the kidlets have continued. Us Canine manimals love a walk. Nothing new there, but after a time Nach started to come with us! A Feline manimal going for a walk....unheard of! But there she was. The habit then spread to her sis, S.B. (also sadly gone), and latterly to her kids, who now work with me at NN.

And now Sonny has taken up the baton as well. So when the Boss takes us for a walk now it's very often it's 4 doglet and 4 catlet manimals. Which is great for us, cos it means we don't have to look for anyone to chase as they're right there! What fun baby!

So, whilst the manimals at NN might not fit every one of the criteria listed above (Table 1) it comes pretty close. The only one which might be in some dispute is the last criterion, an absence of hu-man influence, and that's just because we're not sure if the Boss qualifies as a hu-man or not (see picture above of the chimpanzee)!

And finally, back on Winterwatch once again young Master Packham was holding an absolutely stunning Eagle owl. We live in Spain, as you may know, and as it happens we have an Eagle owl living in the forest just behind our house. At dusk it can be seen swooping low across the almond groves out front, it's resonant call sounding like a deep bass pan-pipe, and as beautiful as it may be (one morning it was there on our gate as we opened the front door) it is certainly deadly. The Boss thinks it is responsible for the loss of both Nacho and S.B., which it may well be because the hunters kill everything else and food must at a premium for a large predator such as this, which may explain why he's 'ordering off the normal menu.' So it just means that all of us watch our backs right now because we don't want to lose any more family!

That's all for now folks.

Weeknd Sports Report with Negrito

Howdy Folks.
Time for a sports round-up; our first of the year and we're going straight for the jugular with questions such as, 'Is Jose Mourinho the worst tempered manager of all time?' and 'Is LVG the man to save United?' And finally, 'does Andy Murray's massive Adam's apple inhibit his serve?'

All this and much more with Negrito at NN....read on for all the facts and goss.

Football : Here at NN we like to cover the stories that others miss and in light of Chelsea's arse-kicking of Swansea 0-5 we are asking why is Mourinho such a grumpy old bugger?  In the post-match press interviews you'd think they'd lost 5-0 instead of having put in what was perhaps the best (first) 45 minutes of football we've seen so far in the PL this season.  He was as glum as a dog without a bone and I couldn't help wondering if he'd got a parking ticket just before the kick-off because I've seen happier looking Pugs than him!  C'mon Jose, what's the problem?  Didn't Roman give you a big enough January transfer budget this year?  Or did one of the police dogs use your leg as a watering post?  We know all about the theory behind the hang-dog face.....court the controversy and keep the pressure off the players!  But really!  Would a smile hurt that much?  We asked 100 people that question and we're now looking for the Pointless answer!  Can you guess what it is to win the coveted Pointless trophy?

Following Louis van Gaal's successes at the World Cup with his Dutch team, we ask do his favoured tactics work in the PL?  The Boss at NN is a die-hard MU fan (poor bar-steward!) and so, on his behalf, I must question whether the 3-5-2 tactics that worked so well in Brazil for LVG, actually work with MU? Acknowledging that he has had notoriously bad luck with injuries thus far, especially at the back, so that for the odd match things may well have been forced onto him, I still question whether a 5-man midfield is working given that the 3 at the back seem completely at odds with each other and what is being asked of them.  Marcus Rojo has yet to convince this canine that he was worth the millions paid for him.  He seems unable to function with any of his compatriots at the back.  This may be down to the fact that Jones, Evans and Smalling are being asked to defend in a way that appears to be as alien to them as E.T. is to the rest of us!  And what's more, they don't seem to be getting more accustomed to the system as the season wears on.  In fact at the back United look as inept now as they did on the first day of the season.  The fact that they are in 4th place is more down to the competitiveness in the PL than their own good, consistent play.  Going forward there is no doubt that they are fearsome, if not yet awesome, but the frailties at the back seem to be rubbing off on Rooney et al  because with RVP, di Maria, Rooney and Falcao you must say they should be scoring a lot more than they are.  So, is LVG the man to put United back on their pedestal?

At NN the jury is still out.  Last season we were never convinced that David Moyes was the right choice. He just wasn't big enough for the job.  There is no doubting LVG's pedigree; he is a proven manager with a successful track record, so like Fergie before him, I hope the board give him time and money enough to complete the job and hope against hope (cos we're fed up with the Boss's tears!) that he invests well.  We're not convinced letting de Gea go would be the right decision.  Without him United may well be in a relegation battle this year instead of fighting for a place in Europe next season.  Investing in Bale, which appears to be the direction LVG is heading, at the expense of de Gea would be bad business, as good a player as Bale is. Rather than spending £100m on another front man, they'd do better to get hold of 2 top class centre backs to reinforce the line in front of de Gea.

Tennis: After Andy Murray's first round success over qualifier Yuki Bhambri we ask the question that no-one else in tennis has the 'balls' to ask.  Does Andy Murray's massive Adam's apple inhibit his serve and his all round game?

We have conducted independent wind tunnel tests with this question in the forefront of our minds and can confirm right now that wind tunnels are indeed extremely windy places, and that once in profile position Murray's obstruction, that has been likened to El Capitan, the cliff face scaled so famously last week by Tommy Caldwell and Kevin Jorgeson, can block out the sun and indeed affect the weather, thus bringing us to the inevitable conclusion that Andy's apple is a hurdle to his further success and advancement in the game.  

However, the fact remains that in spite of this enormous handicap Murray does still seem to be inordinately successful for a Brit tennis player which leaves us wondering if he was whacking the ball back on a level playing field (l.e. he was born anywhere else than Britain, AND had a less than monumental Adam's apple) would he win the lot and go on to be the greatest player in history?

Sorry Andy, but the truth hurts!  Only one question left to ask, does the Adam's apple hurt too?

Cycling:  With the Tour Down Under kicking off the UCI's pro cycling 2015 calender, we're looking at Team Sky's Richie Porte and asking has he got what it takes to triumph in his backyard tour.  We asked our old mate Crocodile Rundown (a distant rellie of Crocodile Dundee but with much more cycling know-how and knowledge) what he thought of Porte's chances.  Here's what he had to say!

"Aw, Porte's a boy alright!  He's got two legs and can defo ride a bike so I reckon that puts him in with a shout provided he can stay off the XXXX thereby allowing the team mechanics to dispense with the stabilisers!  Nothing worse than a pissed team leader.  You end up riding twice as far as the rest!"

So there you have it, straight from the Horse's Mouth (that's a bar on the beachfront) where we found old CR 7 parts to the wind.  Who's wind it was he didn't say and all we could say for sure was that it stunk like an outback dunny!  

And that's all the Sports News for now.  I'm off to peer in the magic mirror and ask some relevant questions of myself, like 'who is the fairest sports reporter of all?'

BFN

Negrito

Children are our future, so why are they leaving in droves?

Editorial
Sunday Comment from NN, Spain

It was interesting, if not predictable that Obama and Cameron would emerge this week after 2 days of talks to announce they would work together to counter the 'poisonous ideology' of Islamic extremists and would (most likely) flout privacy laws in order to achieve their aims makes me somewhat uneasy.

In their joint press conference on Friday Cameron said, "We face a poisonous and fanatical ideology that wants to pervert one of the major religions, Islam and create conflict, terror and death.  With our allies, we will confront it wherever it appears," with Obama adding that they would work together to build "strategies to counter violent extremism that radicalises recruits and mobilises people, especially young people, to engage in terrorism."  (See Reuters for more details)

It is widely accepted that many young people are recruited via social media and I agree that something needs to be done to try and combat this type of recruitment and radicalisation, but it's a very slippery wicket.  If legislation is passed that allows the authorities to close or limit the reach of the sites from where recruitment may or may not occur then Western governments run the risk of being labelled hypocrites.  How can one extol the virtues of Charlie Hebdo to espouse their form of free speech (agree with it or not) and on the other hand legislate against others because they may promote subversive material?

It is a very sticky situation and I'm not sure that anyone knows quite how to combat the problem.  I agree with both Obama and Cameron that something needs to be done to counter Islamic extremism, but I'm not sure that fighting it by passing one-sided, or selective legislation is the way forward.  In the same way tackling the threat militarily is, I think, not the answer.  I think all these will achieve is the radicalisation of the next generation and then the next, and the next.....

According to the Economist the reasons that Western youngsters join IS, among other Islamic groups, are manifold and surely the governments in the West should be looking more at the reasons for the disenchantment and disenfranchisement of the West's young people rather than by trying to shut the gate after the proverbial horse has bolted!  It appears that many may be merely looking for some substance in their life, a bit of meaning to counter the boredom of unemployment or a life with little or no prospect of a meaningful or satisfying future in their homelands.  

Reproduced from The Economist 

I think many people are dismayed by the two-tier society we inhabit these days.  The gap between the rich and the poor, the have's and the have-nots, is growing.  In our 21st Century world should there really be people who go hungry, wherever they live, whatever their religion?  Should there really such a gap between those at the top and those who struggle to make ends meet.  Poverty, hunger and the resurgence of diseases such as typhoid and polio (I realise this is largely due to anti-biotic resistance, but politics also plays it's part) are problems that should not be occurring today.  I understand and fully appreciate it's easy for me sitting here to just say why don't they do this, or do that.  The mechanics and logistics of politics mean that much of what should happen never does just because of the various political systems within which we all live.  But that said, I would assert that if Western governments put greater effort into solving the problems at home, this might make the recruitment of our brothers and sisters that much harder.  After all, if one is generally happy and fulfilled then what reason would there be no reason to leave, would there?

Throughout human history Wars are traditionally fought by the young.  And now in the 21st Century, after the longest period of peace (is that what this is?) in modern history the boundless energies of youth are not being harnessed in any sort of constructive way.  Is it any wonder the youth in the West look on enviously at their generational compatriots in the Middle East and see that they fight for a principal, fight for each other and have something to believe in, whereas at home all they have is a once-a-fortnight visit to the dole office to gee them up.  The natural optimism of youth is irrepressible and yet in the West we seem to want to pull the teeth of our young men and women, telling them to be happy with a life of inequality, unemployment and little or no prospect of a home life, a home of their own and then we tell them to sit back and be good little citizens.  Is it any wonder youth crime, drug taking and now radicalisation are all on the rise.  The street gang members of the 90's are today's radicalised.  The mods and rockers of the 50's and 60's are today's disenfranchised.  You can see, this is not a new problem.  It's just a shame that what we don't have are new answers to a very old question.

In retrospect, I think National Service should never have been stopped, but sadly one can't go back, no matter how much one might wish to.  

Policy makers want to look at what is missing from the lives of the disenchanted youth (see chart above for estimated numbers of foreign fighters recruited by IS) that they can look at the videos of IS and imagine that life could be better under their banner than at home.  For me, that says more about what they leave behind than what they're running too.

It's not about restricting Western freedoms further.  That surely, ultimately plays into the hands of IS and anyway, once a freedom has been taken away it's much harder to return it.  This is no doubt, the thin end of the wedge!  Monitoring our emails, phone calls and spending habits, or restricting our movements as a means of 'securing our own safety' are examples of freedoms that we will never get back.  Happy people have nothing to hide and if we spent more time trying to make our people happy, by giving them a future that they can invest in, something to look forward to, to work for, then surely having Big Bro peering over your shoulder won't be necessary.  So, be brave policy makers; level the playing field and give everybody the same opportunities.  Make all education free; make health free, cap the salaries of all fat-cats no matter what industry they are in - we're all pissed off at the criminal bonuses bankers, for example, receive even after plunging the world into recession - ensure everyone who works earns a living wage, one that enables everyone to put a decent meal on the table.  Stop world hunger, end world poverty and promote equality across all boundaries.  Invest in our youth; stop punishing them for being young.  Give youth the chance to shape their own futures in a world we can all be proud of and we might just find that a few more stay at home.

None of this is easy, but it is all possible.  It can all be achieved.  It can be done in stages, bit by bit and as it happens the simultaneous dismantling and disarming of the terror machine may well accompany it.  Happiness at home is the extremists worst enemy. They pray on disenfranchisement, loneliness and dissatisfaction offering the excitement of a life with guns, the chance to mould their own futures, even if it wasn't exactly what they anticipated their lives would be when they were children.  Take that away and you disarm the extremists, their promotional videos become just that; videos.   

As the song suggests, 'children are our future.'  The problem is that no-one in the West believes that any more, especially the kids themselves, so who can blame them for looking for something else to fill the void in their lives.  The governments of the West must find ways to fill those voids with something more constructive than just talk and empty promises of a bright future.  Just because the youth are young don't make the mistake of thinking they are stupid.  We need to give youth a chance, a chance to grow, to experience, to learn and to choose what is right, what is wrong, what their lives can be, what they should be and we need to be strong enough to trust them to come to the right decisions off their own back.  

Perhaps then we can all go to the shops or take a flight to our holiday destination without fearing that our families are in mortal danger!

Have a good week.